Dos Equis and Bus Stops

   I'm driving along and I see a dude impatiently waiting for the bus to come.

   Typical wide-leg stance, arms crossed, standing in the street, almost getting hit by passing cars, squinting as best he can to possibly catch a glimpse of his beloved bus. But alas, the bus is nowhere in sight. He throws his hands up in the air and walks back to the bench where a few others are patiently waiting.

   Then it hit me! This helped me conjure up a couple more lines for a new Dos Equis commercial:

   "When he stands in the street trying to spot his bus, it really does come faster."

   "When he sighs impatiently at the checkout counter, the line moves faster for him."

   And yet you see it all the time! For some odd reason, people walk out into the street, endangering their own lives just to hopefully get a glimpse of their bus.

   "If the bus driver could just see me, then he'd realize I gotta get home to watch NASCAR! I'm positive he's been doggin' it this whole time, slowly meandering from bus stop to bus stop. Taking his sweet time to open and close those doors, checking to make sure everyone is seated, blah blah friggin' blah! Don't he know who I am?"

   Trust me, dude. Standing in the street showing your impatient body language is not going to make the bus come any faster.

   And that also goes for you people who roll your eyes, put your hands on your hips like Peter Pan or sigh loudly if you think the checkout line is moving too slowly for your taste. It's not like the cashier will think, "Whoa! I am moving entirely too slow! Thanks, Impatient Sigher! I was in a zone, I had no idea!" If you're in a hurry, that's obviously not the cashier's fault. It's your time management that could use improvement. If you're just impatient...deal with it...without displaying it so proudly to those around you for own self-gratification.

   Just calm the hell down, people! Technology has caused all of us to become so impatient. Everything needs to be now now now, fast fast fast! The common housefly has a life span of 15-30 days! Now they sure have a reason to be impatient. The females start laying eggs on day 2! That's like rolling, crawling, walking, running, talking, playing, learning and getting knocked up at the senior prom all in 24 hours!

   Lesson of the day: Just chill out. No need to get all worked up about it. It all starts in the head. Of course there will be times where we're coming down to the wire and we're stressed about it. But let those instances be few and far between. Bus stops? Checkout lines? Sit-down restaurants? Those are easy circumstances in which we can teach ourselves patience. Baby steps, everyone. ;)